I repeat - this is a true story. We owned this dog. I have his pictures.

I'm proud I knew Saint Tuffy, I have fond memories of Tuffy's golden years,

how he enjoyed his retirement, on his comfortable military pension.

Complications from the malaria he picked up on the Bataan Death March,

caused Tuffy's total loss of fur in his later years,

I still have his body toupee, which I have preserved, and use as a throw rug.

He believed in education, and took advantage of the G.I. Bill,

Tuffy went back to school, and received his Bachelor's Degree in Obedience.

Tuffy enjoyed the anonymity old age brought,

noone noticed the stooped old gray dog with dark glasses,

Adversary of the Desert Fox,

First off the landing craft at Omaha Beach ...doing the dog paddle

Sniffed out Hitler's bunker,

Dug the hole for our flag at Iwo Jima,

Vietnam Volunteer, Canine Special Forces.

In response to the millions of cards and letters received by The Tuffy Foundation,

I have been authorized to reveal these glimpses of Tuffy's personal life.

Tuffy would have wanted it that way.

Memorial contributions may be sent to The Tuffy Foundation,

or to the Seattle Veterinary Clinic, where we had Tuffy kicked to death.

Paw autographed prints of a chalk drawing of Tuffy by a noted Japanese artist,

prominently displaying his National Defense Medal, are available for a nominal fee.

We have made a catalog of St. Tuffy memorabilia which you may send for. We suggest you

make reservations for a tour of the Tuffy Mansion at least one year in advance.

And in a limited one-time national offering,

Tuffy's recording of "I did it my way" available in either cassette or compact disk;

VISA and Mastercard accepted; sorry no C.O.D.'s for this special offer.

Mail $ 17.95 to:  Tuffy Theme Song, POB 222, Spangle, WA 99031,

or call 1-800-OLD-TUFF.