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Raw Bytes Computer News KPBX FM 91.1 Radio National Public Radio Network Frank Delaney Producer Broadcast on Thursday Morning 7:35 AM During Morning Edition Support Public Radio ! The Theater Of the Mind |
In computer news this week 11/22/2006 |
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When Norwegian bachelor farmers
prepare a Thanksgiving turkey dinner, their cookbook is the internet ... I’m
cooking a Thanksgiving dinner this year. This is a major undertaking for any guy,
and I am not without a lot of apprehension about getting everything done
correctly. I am a
bachelor, but I’m not Norwegian, I’m 2nd generation
Irish American, and I’m not a farmer, unless you consider computer
programming data farming, which I guess you could by a stretch of the
imagination. But I was mayor once of a farm town ... I only
did this one time before in my life several years ago, and at the time I
lived in a small town where all my neighbors gave me advice on how to do
everything, using traditional methods for everything. The advice they gave me
for planting my garden was “You don’t plant yer
garden until the snow’s melted off Mica Peak”, and their cooking
advice was of that same country sensibility. But now
I’m back living in Spokane, and although I do have a couple invitations
for Thanksgiving dinner, I always like having leftovers the rest of the
weekend, so I’m cooking a turkey too. In fact,
Monday afternoon I went to the grocery store and bought an 18 pound turkey,
stuffing, cranberry sauce, potatoes, sweet potatoes, and vegetables, and
excitedly brought it home, and then the thought dawned on me “I
don’t know how to cook any of this stuff”. It’s not microwavable .... Panic !! Forunately I bought a Norbest turkey, and
found all my answers on www.norbest.com. First
problem is my rock hard 18 lb turkey. The thawing instructions on the bag say
to put it in my refrigerator in a pan. Allow 4 hours thawing per pound.
Let’s see, that’s 3 days – until Thursday afternoon –
too late !! So I’ll have to do some cold
water thawing, putting it in the sink and covering it with cold water and
changing the water. Next
problem will be I have these 2 boxes of stovetop stuffing and what do I do
with them. In this case, both the instructions on the boxes and on the www.norbest.com website say the same thing
– make it on the stove and don’t stick it in the bird. Ok how do
I cook the potatoes and sweet potatoes. I google “How
to boil potatoes ?” The first
5 websites have instructions so complicated that I remember from before that
you peel them, put them in cold water, and cook them until tender. I next
google “How to boil sweet potatoes ?”
The first site comes up and tells me that their Scientific name is Ipomoea
batatas. Gong ! These
suckers are getting boiled the same way. The cranberry sauce is much simpler – take
it out of the can – put it in a dish, and eat it. Do not to eat it directly out of
the can as then people will know
you are really a mannerless oaf. Back to the www.norbest.com for
how to cook the turkey if I ever get it thawed in time, and not only do they
have easy to understand instructions – even for bachelor Irish-American
data farmers – but they even tell you how to cook it in an oven
roasting bag – which I did buy. And my
last fear – how will I know it is done – although www.norbest.com does mention using a meat
thermometer, or seeing if the leg moves freely and the hip joint gives
readily, or if juice runs clear after piercing the thickest part of the inner
thigh – their best Turkey for Dummies advice is “When the
turkey is done when the Tender Timer button pops up” ! I’m
salivating already – come on button ....!!! For Raw Bytes This is Frank Delaney (C) 2006 MTA Micro
Technology Associates http://www.mtamicro.com/kpbx.html PO Box 31522 Spokane, Wa 99223-1522 (509)624-7230 |
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